How time changes you.


Growing up you have many different ideas of what you want to do or grow up to be ‘when you’re older’, for me, I never really had one set dream that I wanted. I was the kid in the class that one week wanted to be a vet and the next week an actress! I went through them all.

There was no doubt that I was creative, most of my ambitions were to do with Art, Drama or music… And most of my childhood I followed the dreams as they came. I went to drama classes with the fabulous Red Rose Chain, although I was never that good at acting, I was part of a group of ambitious and talented people and being part of a production was thrilling to me, as well as learning how to understand Shakespeare. These were some of the best years of my life.

When I was at school we had to choose a placement for ‘work experience’.. My choice? At a school teaching 4-5 year olds ( well sharpening pencils and playing with the children at break time! ) but why I chose this at the time I have no idea, it may have been a whim of wanting to teach. I also went on to do work experience at a Vets and a radio station!

I remember having a very strong ambition to work on film sets, I wanted desperately to be part of film production and I’m happy to say that over the years I have done this, mostly independent short films but films none the less.
In America in 2005 I took ‘acting for film’ classes in Boston, Massachusetts and came away with 3 short films and also a student film I was in!
I have participated in 2 48 hour film projects, the first being with a wide group of people from different backgrounds and a majority already established actors and from the BBC ( I worked behind scenes ) and this spurred my husband and I to go onto doing the second as our own film company and create a great film that was a fun challenge.

At college another ambition of mine was to do holistic therapy and through a year full time at college I went on to get a diploma in holistic therapies ( aromatherapy, Swedish body massage and reflexology) which was fantastic but due to my Hypermobility Syndrome I am unable to do anymore.

Other random things I wanted to do included being a dolphin trainer, ride host for Disneyland, professional dancer, midwife and I’m sure if I thought about it the list would continue.

Fast forward to 2010 and I became a mum. My view of the world has changed and so have my dreams. I no longer know what I want to do ( other than bringing up my wonderful son ) I don’t have an ambition.

What do you do when you lose your drive and don’t know in your head what the future holds? I guess I am limited in what I can do having the Hypermobility as it puts a stop on almost anything physical.

How do I find Me?

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5 thoughts on “How time changes you.

  1. There is nothing wrong with not knowing what you want to do at the moment.
    Understandably your son is your 1st priority,all your experiences to date are being drawn on to teach him about the world (and may I say you are making a fantastic job of it) Had you just had ONE dream you would have missed out on the rounded ‘education’ you have given yourself by choosing to be varied.
    When you are ready you will pursue a new dream and we will be there to encourage you

  2. i always wanted to be a TV presenter Laura and although i did go for 2 auditions i never became one!!! besides, being a mummy is the BEST job of all and looking t your gorgeous boy I would say you are good at this career. you are young and you have plenty of time to think of a job asides from being a mum to Luke – you will get there one day i am sure xx
    ps. good luck with the NaBloPoMo i am doing it too xx

  3. There are times in our lives when we have to move and shake things up, follow the next dream, etc… And there are times when we just have to ‘be’ for a while. The times we have to ‘be’ are just as important. This is your time to ‘be’ – enjoy it.

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